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The reason why I haven’t blogged in a while…

Losing someone close to your heart is unexplainable; how would you feel once you hear the news that someone passed away. You may feel anger, sadness or even depression but these words cannot explain what you truly feel; it is definitely beyond that. Getting over such grief is not easy; it is a process of denial, acceptance and moving on with your life and everybody knows that all these cannot be done in a day or a week. Sometimes it may take almost a year before you could totally say that you are in a stable state.

There are relapses through the process; there are times you might feel better and there are also times where you find yourself crying. There are no shortcuts; you have to go through the process, however there are certain ways which can help ease the pain. It may not totally remove you from sadness or misery but it will surely help you cope up with the loss.

The focal point of this post is to convince you that grieving alone is not going to help; do not isolate yourself because having someone to grieve with you is far better than self-seclusion.

Grieve With Your Family

Regardless of the relationship you have with the deceased, you have to grieve with your family. Family is the foundation of any individual and keeping yourself close to them especially in times like this will help you get by. Your family members are the individuals who know you better than anyone else in your network. There are some instances that even when you don’t talk they already know you are going through pain.

Grieving with your family will let you be yourself; no pretensions, no cover ups, just you. Tell them how you feel and you need them to help you pass this phase. You don’t have to tell all the members of the family as you have the option to choose few members whom you think will lend their ears when you talk.

Grieve With Friends

Not everybody is close to their families and we are not going to tackle that area because each individual has different reasons as to why. If you are in the same situation where you feel more comfortable with your friends rather than with your family, that is absolutely fine. You could talk to your best friend or 2-3 of them and seek for guidance.

You could ask them to come with you to a place where you can relieve your mind for a while. Your friends are people next to your family and sometimes you consider them your family; and with this, you’ll feel more secure.

Grieve With a Community Group

They say that to cope of with this kind of situation, it is better to talk with people who have the same experience like you. You feel more emotionally attached with this group as you know have a common ground; you comfort each other and help each other. Hearing their stories will help you in an inspiring and a positive way, thus it prevents you from entering the world of depression.

There are no rules as to whom you should share your grievances but keep in mind that pent-up anger and sadness will only make the situation worse so you have to find an outlet to release those emotions.

Rest in peace, Ricky Icky. You will always be missed.

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Simple yet Innovative Ways to De-clutter Your Abode

Minimal home decors and neutral colors are more appealing to the eyes rather than those homes with a lot of shelves, chairs or home accessories as it eat up a lot of space and it becomes suffocating. When you check out magazines about home styling, you’ll realize that simple styles and designs are timeless and applying this to your own home will help you out in de-cluttering your life.

People think that owning too many stuff is beneficial but the sad true is – it is NOT. There are more benefits of owning less stuff such as: fewer things to clean, you can find or search for your stuff easily and you can save a lot of money. To a few number of individuals, de-cluttering your own personal space is easier, however, when you are a self-confessed “hoarder,” this is going to be a tough time for you.

Hoarder is a person who loves to amass different things, regardless if it has a sentimental value or not, and has a difficult time in throwing them away. I will have to agree with you that this section will be a tough one for you. But no need to worry as the steps mentioned here will be in general. You do not have to decide abruptly, just take your time to read and understand the reasons behind you need to throw away other things and why you need to keep some.

You may ask yourself why? The answer is just simple. In de-cluttering your life as a whole, you should start with yourself and with your own personal space – that is, your home. Your home is a reflection of yourself; it justifies your personality and how you deal with things. So below are the 10 steps you need to consider:

Step One: The five rock-hard-minute rule. You need to take 5 minutes of your time in picturing the space you want to de-clutter first. This will lend a hand in judging what needs to be thrown away and what needs to stay. It also organizes your thoughts and coming up with a plan in a breeze.

Step Two: 365-Day Item Giving. This step is actually very insightful for hoarders. You have to remember that you do not have to be in a rush towards the way you value things; take one step at a time and do this challenge. In one year, each day you have to pick an item you need to give away; it could be as huge as an extra chair you do not use or small as a candle piece. It may seem a long process for non-hoarders but if you’ll look into a bigger perspective it has a massive transformation in return.

Step Three: One black trash bag could make a difference. Just get a trash bag and fill it with things or stuff you most likely do not need. If some of the things you put inside the trash bag can be of use, then donate it to charitable institutions. You do not only clear your own abode but you could help others at the same time.

Step Four: The ever famous Closet Hanger Try-Out. This is done by most people who single-handedly took the challenge of de-cluttering their life; but it was Oprah Winfrey who made it famous. To locate your clothing pieces which needs to be cleared out, you must hang each and every clothes you possessed (you need a lot of hangers for this trick).

Make sure you hang them in a reverse way and then after wearing each clothe, you have to return them inside your closet with hanger facing right or correct way. In the course of five to six months, you will have a clearer view of which wardrobe pieces you can thrust aside without any trouble. The closet hanger try-out or experiment could also be useful other cluttered areas around the house such as playroom, tools, linens and so forth.

Step Five: Jot a list. If the five rock-hard-minute challenge will not do the trick, then you can jot down a list of areas inside the house that need to be de-cluttered first. It would be better if you’ll start with the easiest area to de-clutter as those difficult areas will take a lot of time to organize. It may sound dull and boring in just doing a list, so here’s what you need to do next.

After finishing one area, you need to stop for the day. Look at the area you finished and the areas which are not and spot the difference. You’ll feel relax and more comfortable looking at a well-organized and simplified area than a messy one.

Step Six: The 12/12/12 Dare. You have to pick 12 things that you need to throw away, another set of 12 things you are willing to donate and a last set of 12 things you need to return to their right owner or find an owner. Imagine, in doing this challenge, it will fix 36 items in one go.

Step Seven: Put up a garage sale. You see not all items you could find inside your house are trash, sometimes, you just have too many stuff that you tend to forget you have those all along. So when you start all the steps mentioned above and if you are on a tight budget, you could put up a mini garage sale to sell the collected items.

If you do not have an extra time to put up a garage sale, then no need to worry. There are store or depot owners who buy second-hand items for cheaper price. Don’t dare to complain if they buy your items half of the original price, you should be grateful instead.

Step Eight: Play with numbers. Some people suggest practicing the Project333, where you only allowed wearing 33 wardrobe pieces in the span of 3 months. With this project, it helped them choose the clothing items they do not really need. You may also follow the same project but don’t just settle with that. Be creative and invent a project of your own and practice it in your everyday living. The vital point of playing with numbers is to face up with life and live with fewer things; and view your learnings from the challenge.

Step Nine: Be creative and imaginative. Humans are sentimental in nature. We value the things we have especially those items that were given as a gift or reward by the people who are closed to our hearts. Most hoarders feel the same way but in an excessive manner. Therefore, if giving or throwing away any item is a hurdle for you, then be creative and imaginative on how you need to live with less material things in life.

For example, you value all the shoe boxes even if the actual shoes are already worn out, then create them as storage boxes by designing the box. There are a lot of websites which could help you out with DIY (Do it Yourself) stuff. Check out Pinterest or Facebook pages to get some ideas of your own.

Step Ten: Four-box Approach. This is the most common and generic method you could use in your expedition to minimalism. All you need is to get four boxes and label them as: junk, give away, stay and reposition. Put all as in everything in the boxes (where you think it belongs); this may take few hours or even days or weeks, however, it will still help you in de-cluttering your home.

You could use two or three steps at the same time; it is all up to you but remember that de-cluttering your own home is a big step in de-cluttering you whole life. 🙂 ❤

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13 Easy Steps in Becoming a Desirable Alpha Male

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He is definitely the type of man every person hopes to be: the chief executive of the business industry, the lead actor of a blockbuster movie, the captain of the ship, the commander of the pack. This person is THE Alpha Male. All men around the globe want to be him while all women in the universe fancy being with him. If you are one of these men who want to be seen as THE Alpha Male, then in this blog you will get to read and understand the simple steps to be that man.

#1. Be confident. Confidence is one of the six key traits an alpha male should have. However, being confident should not be overstated or flashy. It is not wrong to think greatly about yourself; and it is also not wrong to think undeniably in your qualifications and abilities. With such notion, men and even women will absolutely act in response to you. You have to know that there is a huge difference between confidence and arrogance. Do not, in any situation, confuse arrogance with confidence or vice versa. Arrogance is merely low self-respect turned outwards. People think of an arrogant man as a depressed, insecure, immature man, which is the extremely exact opposite of the definition of an alpha male. Confidence on the other hand, illustrates calm internal and central strength, security, and dependability.

#2. Set your position in a group, event or any given occasion. In a given situation where you enter a room as the alpha male, you need to set your mind that people in there will listen and react to anything you have and want to say. Reactions vary, some might think you are pointless, your ideas are vague or to the extent that they will doubt everything, you say. Your main goal as an alpha male is that these people need to respect what you have or need to say. That you matter, that there should be an impact on what you are saying. This is not easy especially if you have a phobia of speaking to others but in the succeeding chapters, this will be further elaborated. The important point here is that you must not doubt of what you say because if you do, every single person in that room will definitely doubt you as well.

#3. Make use of wit to your gain. You have to know that using wit and humor does not mean you need to be the clown or laughing-stock of the crowd. This only means that you should be able to deliver punch lines in a timely responsive manner, smile with unadulterated pleasure, and to laugh or chuckle at yourself. Even to the point where you laugh at other’s comments or jokes but without being spiteful, malicious or cynical about it.

#4. Allow your own body to do the talk. The manner you present yourself speaks enough volume to other people around you, even if you are not making any sound. Your movements, you hand gestures, your mannerisms, and your posture – these launch signals to other people around you regarding your status in the society. Your goal is to make those signals confident and strong, not puny and protective. Below are some key pointers you need to understand:

  • You need to make certain that you practice what you really desire to be. Find out occasions where people gathered, and just walk right in that room proudly. If in any case you do not feel it, then try to remember a situation where you felt proud of yourself, and carry that same feeling every time you practice.
  • Teach yourself the Art of Body Language. There are two particular indications that almost all leaders utilize, and followers react to:
    • “Steepling” demonstrates an enough amount of confidence. You can make that steeple through pressing both your hands’ fingertips collectively, with your palms separated. Remember that you need not to go too high. When your fingertips touch the mouth area, you are showing lack of confidence so avoid doing this. For any 2-way conversation, the male with a higher steeple take charge or control of the conversation.
    • Both hands behind your back. This posture is a mind-set of exposure. You let somebody see power, courage, and confidence. You show your sincerity to listening when you hold both hands at the rear.
  • The eye contact. When you talk, walk around, or any particular movement, make certain to look into other people’s eyes. It signals power, sincerity, and charm. However, this could be extremely difficult if you are afraid in making an eye contact. What you can do is keep your eyes moving. Look them in the eye then move it down at the movement of their mouth when they talk.

#5. Do not be scared to load any place with your mere presence. Always bear in your heart and mind that alpha males stand out in the crowd. You have the stand with a powerful posture. Regardless if you talk, glance or just stand, you need to make use of unrestrained gestures. Lastly, even if you are exploding inside due to nervousness, you still need to look unperturbed and at ease in your environment.

#6. The Secret behind listening. You are considered a true leader when you become an alpha male. A real alpha male does not do the talking that much. In fact, he spends more of his time listening to others than talking. When you listen to what other people say, you need to listen attentively and actively. You have to make sure that when you listen, you listen without any signs of judgment. When people see this in you, more individuals will approach and open up to you. The secret behind listening is getting the trust of other people, which is an important alpha male trait.

#7. Alpha males follow other alpha males. One of the easiest and essential approaches to learn how to become an alpha male is by following or copying other alpha males. Observe their gestures, movements, and postures. Observe how they dress because all alpha males have a keen interest in fashion.

#8. Hit the gym and get physically fit. Having abs, toned biceps, and muscular chest is the least important trait of an alpha male because being a real alpha male comes from within. On the other hand, hitting the gym will maintain your body healthy, which signals that you have the ability to take care of others.

#9. Always make sure that you are honest. There are fake alpha males and other people easily distinguish them. Fake alpha males lie and usually cheat just to get what they want. However, a true alpha male is honest to himself and to the other people. He does not pretend just to be accepted by people.

#10. The proper dress code of a true alpha male. With the endless evolution of today’s fashion, even men try to look better. Alpha males do not wear what is trendy this year or the next one. He wears clothes to stand out from the rest of the males in the group. Avoid from wearing clothes that promote or market a brand, your favorite band or whatnot. You need to keep in mind that you should advertise yourself. Another case in point is that dressing well does not necessarily mean dressing up. Try to learn by heart the three important things:

  • Your wardrobe should always fit you well.
  • Your wardrobe should always be comfortable to wear.
  • Your attire should always be suitable and fitting to a particular event or occasion.

#11. Flirting is not always bad so you must learn it. Having the knowledge on how to build a romantic or intimate connection is vital to all alpha males. Being talented, well established, confident, and attractive does not essentially mean that you got what it truly takes to intermingle with your probable mate. On the other hand, it will give you an advantage. Learn the techniques of getting away from being friend zoned and different approaches on how to flirt properly. You do not want to send a wrong message to your potential mate and be slapped at the end, do you?

#12. Develop or learn new skills. Being true alpha ale is not just about confidence, fashion, hairstyle or being physically attractive. Developing new skills or abilities is also considered. This shows that you continuously learn and not afraid of change. You become dependable and well-rounded individual who people will search for when they have questions.

#13. Be a leader, not a mere follower. You do not have to be a manager or a department head to become a leader. And you have to know the difference between a boss and a leader because a leader does not only take control but also does it well. Offer help, take accountable of your mistakes, and share credit to colleagues are some of the things that identify a true leader.

You may find it interesting what kind of woman in the world giving tips about being a desirable Alpha Male. Well, having a male-dominated family tree and working with guys (for years) did the trick. What about you? Any tips you’d like to share? Drop a comment and let us share our ideas. Thanks for sharing Pinay Time with me, Lovelies. 🙂 ❤

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SHORT BLOG: Uncommon Ways to Manage Stress

Yes, meditation is always mentioned in Stress Management, however, you will get to see some weird and uncommon ways to manage the level of stress you currently possess. Sometimes, adding a bit of wit, humor, and odd techniques will keep your interest in practicing such approaches every single day.

The secret behind the green nail polish

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Most psychologists say that having a sight of green pigment has calming effects and could help in organizing your stress. This is one unique way in reducing stress, and all you need to do is place a dot of green nail polish to a certain thing you always bring every day. This dot will be a sort of a reminder that you need to take it slow and relax for a while.

Match your dress code with a rubber band around your wrist

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Some might even laugh due to this technique’s absurdity; however, a specific psychologist named B.F. Skinner stated that punishment is employed rather than reinforcement. Try wearing a rubber band around your wrist and every single time you feel stress, snap the band. In doing so, you are hypothetically associating stress with the pinch when you snap the band. Eventually, you will subconsciously attempt to avoid the feeling. Moreover, when you avoid it, alter it with a more positive routine. Remember; always try to make it a point to incorporate the four major A’s in dealing with your stress.

Always bring chewing gum wherever you go

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Chewing gum does not only freshen up your breath but it also minimizes anxiety and stress. In the year 2008, a study was led by Dr. Andrew Scholey, which tested the participants by allowing them to chew gum regularly. After a couple of months, those participants who chewed gum were established with lower anxiety level, reduced stress, and increased alertness rather than those participants who did not. So, I do not know about you, but I might as well bring a pack of Double Mints. There is no harm in trying anyway.

In view of the fact that every single person has a one of its kind reaction to stress, there is zero “one-size-fits-all” solution to dealing with it. No solitary procedure or method works for everybody. As a result, make use of the different strategies and methods. Put your focus on the things that make you feel relax and in control.